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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22386136">Absolute love</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Partyyyyyyy/pseuds/Partyyyyyyy'>Partyyyyyyy</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fullmetal Alchemist</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>M/M, Post-Promised Day, Rape Recovery, Rape/Non-con Elements, Torture</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-01-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-01-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 17:47:35</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Rape/Non-Con</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,771</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22386136</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Partyyyyyyy/pseuds/Partyyyyyyy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Ed is abducted and tortured. He recovers with the help of his friends and his lover Roy.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Edward Elric/Roy Mustang, Roy Mustang &amp; Team Mustang</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>66</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Absolute love</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is my first time writing anything like this, so the details might be missing and content incomplete. Please let me know if you have any ideas on how to improve this! <br/>My English is pretty crappy too, so please excuse grammatical mistakes and errors in phrasings. <br/>Please leave constructive criticisms, or just criticisms in general! That would be very very helpful!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>A figure sat motionlessly on the uneven concrete. Shivers wrought through his small and frail body violently and uncontrollably. A thick, black cloth covered his eyes and a thick, narrow collar chained its neck to the wall with a short chain, constricting both its breathing and movements. Blood and pus oozed out from gashes and lacerations that marred his chest and back, converging to form a small puddle of fluids by its stomach. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Its ribs were clearly visible, which indicates malnourishment. Some were clearly broken while others were fractured, placing pressure on its lungs. Breathing was clearly painful as each miniscule rise and fall of its chest drew an agonised gasp from the figure. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The figure only had two limbs: an arm and a leg. Its arm was bent in unnatural angles. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Upon closer inspection, one would find that all five of its fingers have been broken, a mangled mess incapable of moving as any motion would leave the figure paralysed in pain. The soles of its legs have been burnt, a steady flow of greenish pus oozing out of inflamed flesh. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Its automail ports seemed to have sustained the worst abuse. It seemed as if the figure had been used as an electrical conductor, with wires from both ports connected to an electricity supply. The skin by the ports have been damaged extensively -- white bone can be seen peeking out from where it should be. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A small puddle of water collected in the vicinity of the figure. It seemed as if he had been doused with water again and again whenever he had fallen unconscious. A red bucket filled to the brim with ice cold water stood innocently not far away from the figure. A piece of white towel can be seen floating motionlessly on the surface of the water. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Yes. This emaciated, vulnerable figure is indeed the Fullmetal Alchemist. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Abruptly, an explosion blasted the wooden door off its rusty hinges. The smoke cleared to reveal none other than the Flame Alchemist and his team. Hawkeye stood to his right, one pistol pointing sideways and the other, forward. Havoc stood to the right of Hawkeye and Breda, to the left. Both of them had their handguns drawn, pointing at the empty corridors. Falman sat in the driver’s seat of their car along with Fuery, ready to act and drive at a moment’s notice.   </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The Flame colonel to the rescue, then. How predictable. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Slowly, Roy stepped into the room. He gagged imperceptibly at the odour of blood, but largely remained composed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Edward?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He strode to the boy’s side and shook him gently. Edward’s response was immediate. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Just kill me already… you… fuckers --” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Whatever he wanted to say was then cut off by a violent coughing spell which shook his small frame and left him gasping for air. Roy frowned. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Edward. It’s me.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Roy?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah. It’s Roy. Come on. We’re getting you out of here.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Quickly, Roy directed his flames towards the short chain that stuck him to the wall. The chain broke with a barely audible “snap” and instantly, Edward’s head lolled forward, which would have sent him sprawling on the floor if not for Hawkeye crouching in front of him, prepared for this reaction. The motions seemed to be too much for the boy, however, as he let out a quiet scream upon minimal movements. A pained grimace painted over Hawkeye’s normally stoic face as Roy’s cold, obsidian eyes filled with sorrow. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Let’s move. We don’t have time to waste. Havoc, Breda, take him to Knox’s. Call Hughes and Al. Hawkeye, you’re with me. We’ll sweep this warehouse for evidence, then head to Knox’s immediately afterwards.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes, sir.” His men chorused, then sprang into action. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-- </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Lights. Dim, yellow lights. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He could see again. Huh. That’s new. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Did he die, he wondered. Was that why he was facing Truth again? </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>But he felt pain. A lot of pain. He’s living in a world of pain, had been for who knows how long. And dead people don’t feel pain.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Kid, what the fuck happened to you?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That gravelly voice infused with annoyance sounded familiar. Ah, so he was rescued then…? </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Okay. That meant he was safe. If he wasn’t, well, he did not have the energy to deal with it at the moment so it’ll have to wait. He’s gotten used to pain anyway. There isn’t really much worse they could do. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Unless… they’re doing what they did last time… </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Get the fuck away from me!!” He screamed as he leapt up from the bed. Bed…? </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Knox threw his hands up in the air and backed away from the bed, an angry scowl across his face. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The door burst open and in ran Roy and Hughes. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Edward! You’re okay now! You’re not at wherever they kept you anymore!” Hughes spoke soothingly as he advanced towards the bed with his hands up in the air. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Apparently, the movements jostled the injuries that littered throughout his body. Black spots danced across his vision and he was dragged under, back into the realm of unconsciousness once more before he had a chance to respond to Hughes’ pleas. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What happened here, Dr Knox?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You know very well what happened Mustang, you’ve seen this plenty in Ishval anong POWs. Don’t feign ignorance, it doesn’t suit you. And when did you get here anyway?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“The lieutenant and I have just arrived from the warehouse where we found Fullmetal. Have you had a chance of patching him up fully yet?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“No. But I do know the full extent of his physical injuries. I’m only going to say this once, Mustang, so you’d better get whoever needs to know this information here right now.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s just Hughes and I. His brother is still on the train bound for Central. He’s been looking for him in the East.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Very well. You’re not going to like this. He’s got knife inflicted wounds all across his chest and back. These knives are likely serrated, judging by the shape and depth of the wounds. He’s been whipped, likely by electrified whips too, judging by the bruising surrounding the deep red lash marks on his back. It’s gonna hurt for him to lie on his back for quite a while. But that’s not the only reason he won’t be comfortable lying on his back. I suspect there was forced penetration--” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What?!” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“which suggests he might have been forced to perform other sexual acts against his will. The soles of his feet have been burned quite extensively, but not enough that he will lose sensation and function of the limb. He has at least four fractured ribs and five broken ones. His fingers have all been broken at least twice at two different joints. His automail ports have been damaged extensively by high voltage electricity passed through them and therefore, his nerve endings need quite some time to heal. He should not wear his automail for quite some time. There was also a bit of water in his lungs, likely due to waterboarding. That and the infection from his wounds has developed into pneumonia. His trachea is damaged, likely by strong pressure on his throat and screaming. Obviously, he’s severely malnourished and he’s lost a lot of blood. I think that’s all, if I haven’t missed anything… any questions?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Will he recover fully, and how long will that take?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It is likely that he will but it’ll take at least three to six months.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A mournful silence blanketed the room. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’ll start him on antibiotics for the pneumonia and painkillers for the pain, then I’ll bandage his wounds and reset his bones. The bandages need to be changed daily. The antibiotics need to be taken thrice daily for two weeks and the painkillers are to be taken whenever he deems it necessary. No strenuous activity for at least six months, is that clear? Otherwise, his wounds may never heal properly.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Both men nodded. The doctor sighed in irritation and resignation, then glared at Roy. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Mustang, what the hell have you gotten him into? Wasn’t the ordeal with Bradley taxing enough for everyone? Then you go drag his teenage ass into another mess. The hell is wrong with you? You know what, don’t answer that. I don’t want to know, lest you drag my ass into trouble too. It’s Major General now, isn’t it? Take care of him. I’ll send the bill to Fuhrer Grumman.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Mustang nodded mutely, then trotted to the nearby couch with his head down as he watched the doctor work in silence. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s not your fault, Roy. You couldn’t have known.” Hughes murmured as he settled down beside Roy. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I should’ve known though. He hasn’t come home in three days! Three whole days! Normally even if he doesn’t come home he’d call me to let him know he’s safe!” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Nobody could have known, Roy. Stop beating yourself up over this. The best you can do now is to be there for him as he recovers.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Roy nodded absently, his eyes glued to the frail figure on the bed. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It took us two weeks to find him, Hughes. Two, whole, weeks. We should have found him sooner! And now he’s on bed rest for six months… what kind of boyfriend am I? I’m the flame alchemist for fuck’s sake, how can I be this helpless?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Roy, we practically lived in the office for two weeks trying to look for Ed. You can’t blame anyone except those that took him.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes I can! They took him to blackmail me! I should’ve just said yes and let them take me in exchange for Ed and his safety. I’m not worth him lying on the bed scarred for life!” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What good would that have done, Roy? They would have just killed both of you if you’d turned yourself in. It would have been an incredibly stupid and idiotic move. Don’t focus on the past, Roy. That won’t do any good. Just, be there for him now. Take him home, make him feel at home.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Once again, Roy nodded lacklusterly, obsidian eyes focused on Ed as the doctor wrapped him in layers of white. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-- </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>White ceiling. A single lightbulb hanging from the ceiling. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Navy blue blankets emanating the spicy scent of Roy. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Home. He was home.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Was he dreaming? </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Blearily, he moved his arm to rub the sleep away from his eyes… </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Only to find that it has been covered in thick layers of white bandages. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The simple movement sent jolts of pain down his spine, which brought him to full wakefulness. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>His entire body hurt. It would have been easier to point out where it didn’t… </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Where </span>
  <em>
    <span>did</span>
  </em>
  <span> it not hurt?  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>And what the hell had happened to him? </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Memories began flooding his mind as he recalled what had happened. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He was heading to his lab one morning when suddenly, he felt like he was being watched. He turned around, but didn’t see anything suspicious. To play safe, he took an alternate route to his lab instead. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The same thing happened when he went home the same day and the next day, the day after the next and so forth for about a week. Then the weekend came and he slept in and had sex, tons of it, with Roy. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Then came Monday, and on the way to work, he felt like he was being followed again. This time, he saw a group of suspicious people. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It was at times like these that he regretted not taking Hawkeye up on the offer of teaching him how to shoot properly, or not taking Hughes up on the offer of teaching him the art of throwing knives. He was, after all, still acclimating to losing his ability to perform alchemy. He still had his automail arm, though, because it was only after exchanging his arm for Alphonse’s soul again did he realise what he had to do. And everyone that knew him knew his one true concern was his brother, not himself. It had never been about himself. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>So he broke into a sprint and went through multiple twists and turns, trying to lose his pursuers as he switched between alternate routes. However, at one particular turn, he found himself surrounded by people wearing black masks and holding menacing weapons. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Fine. If it was a fight they wanted, a fight they would get. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Let it be known that Edward Elric was not defenceless even without his alchemy. He immobilised at least half of his pursuers without sustaining many injuries. He might not know how to throw knives, but he sure as hell did know how to stab people with one. It was then that he had forgotten that he no longer had the ability to perform alchemy and wasted precious time clapping, which gave his assailants time to clap a chloroform soaked cloth over his mouth and nose. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He woke up, blindfolded, collared and chained. People always wanted something in abductions -- that is essentially how it worked. So he asked them what they had wanted immediately after he first regained consciousness and took inventory of his surroundings. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Apparently, they hadn’t wanted anything. They had merely wanted to hurt his boyfriend, Roy, by hurting “his favourite fucktoy”. They had also thought the fact that his rank jeopardised his lover would galvanise him to reconsider his climb towards fuhrership and resign. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ed could not help but laugh out loud after hearing why they had abducted him. Damn, people can be so stupid. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They then proceeded to toy with him in multiple different ways. There were knives, and whips, and electricity, and brands, and Ed endured it without a scream. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>What finally made him scream was when they raped him. Took his pants down and thrusted into him without any warning. Oh, he screamed, not out of pain, but out of shame. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ed was, after all, still a young man in his late teens. That meant his sex drive was quite active and sensitive. When they thrust into him, even though it was extremely painful, he could not help but be aroused. They then proceeded to jerk him off against his will and he came again, and again, and again. Each time they fucked him, they jerked him off. And he truly did try to force himself not to enjoy it, but his body had other ideas in mind and he just -- </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He felt so ashamed and he felt like a slut. He also felt that he had betrayed Roy. Roy was the only one that could make him come because he was Roy’s and Roy was his. It was a privilege reserved for Roy only and yet, he had succumbed to his wanton needs when he was being </span>
  <em>
    <span>raped</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>How could Roy ever love him? </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>And then they waterboarded him, leaving him gasping desperately for air. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>And then he just… detached himself from reality. Until now, apparently. He vaguely remembered Roy’s voice before being rescued, but it was hazy at best. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A warm hand gently wiped his face. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey love. Why are you crying?” Roy’s warm voice prodded gently. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Had he been crying? Huh. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He had half a mind to tell Roy, but the other half feared Roy’s reaction. Better to keep it a secret for now. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Nothing. Just glad to be home. And you? Are you okay?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Typical Edward. He always puts others before himself. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t worry about me, love. Worry about yourself. I’m not the one that’s been kidnapped and tortured for two whole weeks.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Arduously, Edward shifted on his side to look Roy in the eye. To anyone else, Roy might seem like a mystery, but years with Edward allowed him to read Roy like an open book. And he knew Roy had the tendency to blame himself for absolutely everything and anything that happened. Roy had a guilt complex that could rival his own. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>So he stared deep into Roy’s eyes, looking for the telltale signs of guilt and self loathe. Sure enough, he found it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Roy. Stop blaming yourself already. This isn’t your fault.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Roy simply looked away, head bowed in guilt. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You don’t know why they took you… do you?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>In response, Ed snorted in amusement.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Of course I do. Damn, people’s stupidity never ceases to amaze me. They thought capturing me would force you to rethink your bid for fuhrership. How fucking moronic is that?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Roy’s averted face told Ed all he needed to know. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Roy. Look at me.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Roy turned his face reluctantly to face Ed. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Your rank did not put me in danger. You are not the reason why I was abducted. I was kidnapped because some sick fuckers thought it’d be fun to mess around with me, nothing more. Do you understand me?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“They told me they had you to blackmail me. I should have just gone there in exchange for your safety…” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Roy. I’m not defenceless, alright? I can take care of myself. You worry about getting to the top and changing this country for the better.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A hesitant silence filled the room. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“If you’re going to tell me that you’re reconsidering your ambition to become fuhrer, I will slap you even though I’m in fucking pain myself. Look, as a former state alchemist, I will always be in danger. In fact, I have always been in danger and I’m not dead yet. That proves this is not your fault and I can take care of myself. Don’t give yourself too much credit.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A small smile graced Roy’s mouth. That jab was typical of Edward.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay. Now drink this.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A glass of water was shoved at Ed’s face. Suddenly, Ed noticed how thirsty he was. Greedily, he gulped down the water, then handed the empty glass back to Roy. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Get some sleep, Ed. You need it.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>At that, a drowsy haze overtook Edward, clouding his judgement and consciousness. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Fucker drugged me…” He mumbled angrily as he faded to unconsciousness. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’ll thank me later.” A smug voice intoned. Ed could hear the smirk in his voice. Good. At least he wasn’t blaming himself as much anymore at the moment. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-- </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When he woke again, Alphonse was by his bedside. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Brother! You’re awake! I’ve been so worried!” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m okay Al. You don’t have to worry anymore.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s okay to not be, you know, brother…” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Damn. Al has always been too perceptive for his own good. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Nothing’s wrong, Al --” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Ed. I know.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“About…?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Your injuries. The General knows too.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“They’re not a big deal Al. Just some physical wounds. Nothing to worry about.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“But they aren’t just physical wounds, are they?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Al, what are you talking about…?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Stop feigning ignorance brother. I’m not stupid.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I know you aren’t Al. I just don’t want to burden you with my own problems. I’ve done enough of that for a lifetime…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Al sighed exasperatedly. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Ed. We did what we did together. I’m as much to blame as you are. Besides, you’ve already gotten my body back. We’re brothers. We deal with problems together, because we are all the family we have left.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It was Ed’s turn to sigh. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I know, brother. But I don’t want to talk about it yet. I can’t. I’m sorry Al…” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I know, Ed. I’m here for you when you’re ready. But please, Ed, stop pushing yourself that hard. It’s okay to not be fine. Nobody will hold it against you.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ed smiled at that. He’s lucky to have a younger brother like Al. To think of all the pain he’s caused him… </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay.” Ed conceded.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Great! Are you in any pain?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Lots. But it’s fine. I don’t want any pain medication. That stuff makes me sleepy.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Brother. You can’t get better if you don’t rest. The medication is supposed to make you sleepy so your body can heal. I’ll go grab some. Hughes is outside. I’ll tell him to come in, if that’s alright?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Sure, Al. But no pain medication! I don’t need need that crap to rest!” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The door slammed as Al left the room. Seconds later, someone knock politely on the door. Then it opened to reveal Hughes. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey Ed. How are you holding up?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey Hughes. I’m fine. Really.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hughes scrutinised Edward, taking in all the information. He wasn’t the head of Intelligence for no good reason. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“We’re all worried about you, you know. Especially Roy.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Unnecessarily so. I’m fine. They’re just physical injuries. I’ve dealt with worse in the past, and I’m still fine.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span> “Just, talk to Roy when you’re ready.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah yeah. I will.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hughes continued to scrutinise Ed for a while longer. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“We managed to arrest most of your captors. Two of them are still at large though. We believe they have escaped to Creta.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s good to know. Thanks, Hughes.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You seem to be handling your capture suspiciously well.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s nothing I’m not used to. The pain isn’t new, the dumb captors aren’t new. These things are not really worth losing additional sleep and brooding over.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“That sounds ominous…” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Anyway, I’ve been meaning to ask. I’ve already told Roy renouncing his bid for fuhrership over this incident is stupid, but I’m not sure I drove it into his thick skull. You know very well how stubborn he can be. Can you do me a favour? Keep an eye on him and let me know if he shows any sign of doing so? It’s not exactly convenient for me to follow him around at the moment…” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Sure thing Ed.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Thanks Hughes. Really.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Now, have you seen the newest batch of Elysia’s photos? She’s seven now and she’s grown even more adorable!” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Al! The medication, please!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-- </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Slowly but steadily, his physical injuries healed. In two months’ time, his back and chest has fully healed and his foot and broken bones were well on their way to recovery. He got the approval from Doctor Knox to have his automail attached again. There were scars everywhere, but Ed was used to having scars all over his body from adventures when he was searching for the philosopher’s stone. More importantly, Roy was with him every step of the way. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Something still gnawed at him though. He knew he needed to talk to Roy about the other injuries he had sustained during his brief capture. But somehow, whenever he tried, the words would not come to him. Therefore, he’s been dismissing it as his physical injuries impeding his ability to do much sexually, so he’s been able to evade the conversation without seeming too suspicious. Either way, Roy never held it against him. He gave him the space and time he needed to heal and sort his thoughts out. He wondered what he ever did to deserve such an amazing boyfriend. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>But he felt guilty for delaying the conversation, and feared the prospect of not being able to fulfill his boyfriend’s sexual needs for some time. He knew Roy had been jerking off in the shower due to his inability to fulfill said needs, and everytime he heard him it drove the spear of guilt and self loathe a little deeper into his stomach. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>He thought about telling Al, but he did not want to further burden his brother, despite what Al said.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He needed to address the elephant in the room. And soon. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>So he cooked dinner, poured some nice wine, and waited by the table for Roy to return home from his work. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When he actually did, Ed became unexpectedly jumpy. He flinched subtly at Roy’s movements and kept his head down as Roy moved to sit on his end of the table.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Very nice of you to cook dinner, love. This smells wonderful!” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ed gave a sheepish smile in response.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Silence befell the room as the two began to eat slowly. There was no mindless chatter about how their days were, only the deafening silence ringing by their ears and the thickening tension smothering both of them. Ed kept his head down, glancing up occasionally, only to be met by Roy’s concerned face. Suddenly, he felt nauseous and pushed his plate away. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Roy noticed his behaviour but kept eating, pretending as if nothing is wrong despite concern and fear wafting off of him in waves. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ed opened his mouth, closed it, opened it, then closed it again. He huffed a sigh of irritation at his own awkwardness. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Roy, please promise me you won’t talk until I finish talking. I’m… not sure I could go on if I stopped.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Roy stopped eating, put his fork down and nodded, staring intently at Ed. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>With a deep breath, he closed his eyes and began: </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I know you know I’ve been raped, Roy. But that’s not the full story. They stuck their dicks in me and… my body responded in kind. They jerked me off as they fucked me and I… came. Multiple times. I’m sorry Roy I really am. I tried to stop it, really, I did. But I couldn’t. So I’m sorry and I understand if you don’t want me to be here anymore because of what I did…” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Tears began sliding down beneath his closed eyes. He could not bear to open his eyes, could not bear to see the anger and rejection in Roy’s eyes, could not bear to see the man he loved deeply feel so betrayed because of himself. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He felt a gentle pressure beneath his chin, and calloused hands wiping his tears away. Fearfully, he opened his eyes, bracing himself for Roy’s fury. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Instead, kind and warm eyes greeted him, full of love and infatuation.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Shh, love. It’s okay. I understand. Don’t blame yourself, alright?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A bout of irrational anger overtook him. He stood up, the chair falling behind him as he slammed his hands on the table.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“How can you forgive me? I betrayed you, in the worst way possible! I basically just told you that I cheated on you! And you’re okay with that?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Ed. You didn’t betray me. You can’t exactly control your body, especially at the age of sexual prime. Your body responds to stimulation whether you like it or not. I’m not sure I would have done differently in your position. It’s not your fault.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“But it is! It is! I’m not supposed to do that for anyone but for you! I could have not done it I just couldn’t I don’t know why but I’m sorry I really am. Please forgive me! But if you won’t I understand it too…” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“There is nothing to forgive you for, Ed. But if it makes you feel better, then yes, I forgive you, love. I promise.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Tears began pouring out of Ed’s eyes. Roy… excused his atrocious acts of cheating…? He forgave him…?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A gentle pressure forced his chin up. He averted his eyes, electing to stare at the floor tiles instead. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Love, look at me. Listen to me. This. Is not. Your fault. Alright? There is nothing to be ashamed of. This does not make you a slut, or a whore. It’s merely your body responding to its biological needs, that’s all.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“So… in fact… you still… love… me?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes, silly. Nothing will ever make me fall out of love with you.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ed wailed, then buried his face in Roy’s jacket, sobbing painfully and hiccuping loudly while Roy rubbed his back, shushing him lovingly. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“But, there is, Roy. I… don’t think… I can have you in me for a while… and don’t lie! I heard you jerking off in the bathroom. I know you want to do it!” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Ed. It’s merely my body responding to its biological needs. It’s fine. We can move along at our own pace. There is nothing to worry about, alright? Everything’s fine. No buts, Ed. Despite what you think, there is truly nothing that can make me fall out of love with you. Nothing. I’m incredibly lucky to have such an amazing and beautiful man as my boyfriend. I’m not giving you up that easily, alright?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ed continued sobbing into Roy’s jacket, burying his face in it as the jacket absorbed his tears. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hush… it’s alright love…” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>And it just may be. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-- </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Epilogue </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p><span>“</span><em><span>Ah!</span></em> <em><span>General!” </span></em><span>Ed moaned, as Roy sucked on his length eagerly. Ed’s hands found their way in Roy’s hair, trying not to pull at them as he bucked and writhed on the bed. </span></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Suddenly, Ed patted Roy on his head emphatically, signalling him to stop. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Roy emerged from the blankets, pupils dilated and mouth swollen from the kissing. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ed looked Roy in the eyes, golden eyes blazing with determination. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m ready Roy.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Are you sure, Ed? We can always wait if you don’t feel like it…” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I am. I promise.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Roy looked at him in absolute adoration and wonderment, grinning at him happily. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Please leave constructive criticisms, or just criticisms in general, or just comment! That would be very very helpful!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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